I (25F) have been dating a guy (31M) for the past two months. Last night, he casually dropped a bombshell—he has two kids.
I was completely shocked that this was the first time he was mentioning it. We even spent time together over Christmas, and he didn’t bring it up once. I’ve never dated someone with kids before, so naturally, I had a ton of questions. By the time I asked my fourth question, he got defensive and sarcastically asked if I was a cop for interrogating him.
Eventually, I explained that I felt blindsided. It felt like he was keeping this a secret and sprung it on me as if it was no big deal. That’s when he opened up and revealed that his two kids have different mothers, and they don’t get along because the kids were born only four months apart. Oh, and the youngest is only 9 months old.
😦😦😦
At this point, I was completely floored.
We were both a little tipsy, so I told him I needed time to think and wanted to head back to my apartment. He insisted I shouldn’t take the subway alone (we’re in NYC), so we ended up going back to his place instead. I slept in the spare room and left early around 5 a.m. Now, he’s blowing up my phone, saying this is why he didn’t want to tell me—because he was afraid I wouldn’t like him anymore.
I can’t stop laughing at how absurd this situation is. How did I not realize this man has two kids? Is he just that good at hiding it?
I’m seriously considering breaking up with him. If he could lie about something this major, what else is he hiding?
UPDATE:
Thank you to everyone who responded.
I’m still in shock, but I’ve officially broken up with him and blocked him on everything.
For context: He admitted that “baby momma #1” was his girlfriend at the time, and after they broke up, they were still hooking up. Meanwhile, during their breakup, he started hooking up with other women, which led to baby momma #2. When I asked why there’s nothing in his apartment for the kids, he said, “I’m not really in their lives right now.” (So yes, as many of you guessed, he’s essentially a deadbeat dad.)
He claimed I was “overreacting” and “tripping” for ending things over this, so I sent him the link to this post. I’m still processing everything, but I’m 100% done with this man.
AITA for reacting like this?
