I (16M) am the youngest of five siblings, with a significant age gap—my siblings are all at least 11 years older than me. My parents were done having kids after four and even went as far as my dad getting a vasectomy. However, six years later, my mom unexpectedly found out she was pregnant with me. She was 13 weeks along when she learned, and I grew up knowing that if they had found out sooner, she would have had an abortion.
My siblings were vocal about their resentment towards me being born. They often called me “mom and dad’s mistake” or “the oops” and generally made me feel unwelcome. Family holidays were especially painful—they would exchange gifts but leave me out, or outright ignore me.
My parents didn’t treat me much better. They saw me as a burden rather than their child. Requests for attention, like bedtime stories or a hug, were met with annoyance and rejection. They’d often eat meals without me, and there were even times I’d come home to find the rest of the family, including my siblings, having “family dinners” without me. This extended to outings too—dinners at restaurants or vacations often excluded me, or I was brought along only to serve as a babysitter for my siblings’ kids.
As my siblings began having children, I became the default babysitter. Whether it was at home or during vacations, I was expected to look after the kids without being asked. My parents always gave their permission on my behalf, even when I was uncomfortable or unwilling.
For those wondering, yes, I am biologically both of my parents’ child—this isn’t a case of me being excluded because I’m not related to one of them. The truth is, my parents were done with children, and my siblings didn’t want a younger brother, so I’ve been treated as an unwanted addition to the family my entire life.
I’ve tried addressing these feelings with my parents and siblings, but my concerns are dismissed or ignored. Writing a letter might seem like an option, but I don’t trust that they’d even read it, let alone care.
Recently, I’ve been spending more time at my girlfriend’s house, where her family treats me far better. When I sense that my family is about to rope me into babysitting, I leave. Last Saturday, they planned a family night out and dropped the kids off at home, expecting me to watch them. I wasn’t there, and my mom called, furious, demanding that I come home to babysit.
That’s when I finally snapped. I told her to let everyone know that I’m done being their free childcare and that I refuse to be treated like this anymore just because I was an “unwanted pregnancy.” I didn’t choose to be born, and I won’t let them continue to exploit and disrespect me.
Their reaction was predictably hostile, and they’re furious with me for standing my ground. Despite this, I’ve held firm.
So, AITA for refusing to babysit anymore and calling out my family for their treatment of me?
