I (18F) recently threw a birthday party to celebrate my 18th, a milestone I wanted to mark in a special way. I invited all my friends months in advance and even adjusted the date to accommodate some of them. Normally, I’m pretty low-key about birthdays, but this time I went all out. The party had a theme, and I spent days prepping food, drinks, music, and even rented a slushy machine because one of my friends requested it. It cost me hundreds of dollars, but I wanted everyone to have a great time.
On the day of the party, my friend M (18F) called to say she’d be about an hour late—this was three hours before the party started. I told her that was fine and that I was looking forward to seeing her. Then, around the time she was supposed to arrive, she messaged me saying she had “lost track of time” and would be there in a few more hours. I was annoyed but told her, “See you then.”
Later in the evening, as the party was winding down, she messaged again, saying, “Hey, I’ll leave here in 10 and be at yours in about an hour.” By then, people were leaving, and we were cleaning up, so I told her not to bother coming. She said “okay” and didn’t message me again that night.
After the party, my mom asked if M had shown up. I said no and admitted it made me feel unimportant to her. My mom agreed. The next day, I messaged M to ask what had kept her. She admitted she went to another party to hang out with a guy she liked. I just replied “okay” and left it at that.
Fast forward to the concert. As a birthday gift, my mom gave me two tickets to see an artist I’d been dying to see. Not wanting to leave anyone out, I bought a third ticket with my own money so that M and another friend could come too.
A few days after my party, I called M to tell her how much it hurt that she skipped my birthday. She blamed me, saying it was my fault because I told her not to come. I explained I only said that because she would have arrived after the party had ended. She dismissed my feelings, saying, “It wasn’t a big deal, and you need to forgive and forget.”
I told her it was a big deal to me and that I wasn’t ready to just move on. She then said, “Whatever, I’ll drive you to the concert to make up for it. What date is it?” That was the last straw for me. I told her that if my birthday wasn’t important to her, then the concert wasn’t either. I uninvited her, saying the tickets were technically mine and I didn’t want her there. She argued that the ticket was “rightfully hers” because I had invited her initially. I refused, and she hung up on me.
A few days later, she texted me, “Have you grown up yet or am I still not invited?” I didn’t respond.
So, AITA?
